BE•REN•MAN

Baohaus NYC

Posted in Food by Chris on February 24, 2012
What’s better than being reminded of your childhood as you eat? Nothing. While Baohaus might not give you average homeboys out there a reminiscence of your youth — it should at the very least — please your senses as you bob your head to music and fill your belly with Baos. If you have no idea what the hell I’m talking about — in reference to Baos — please shift your eyes further to the right. While Baos come in all shapes and sizes, these Baos are slightly sweet, taco-shaped, and are filled with your choice of protein (except that, sicko). My favorite is the Chairman Bao: braised all natural Berkshire pork belly served with crushed peanut, cilantro, Haus Relish, and Taiwanese red sugar. If you’re afraid of fatty meat, try the Birdhaus Bao which is all natural fried chicken that is brined overnight and served with spicy seasoning salt, cilantro, crushed peanuts, and Taiwanese red sugar. If you like neither, you’re simply un-American. I just had to eat a slice of cheesecake to get my tongue to stop watering. I hope you’re able to go to Baohaus to get yours to stop. Baohaus is located at 238 E 14th St (2nd Ave), just blocks away from the NYU auxiliary rec center. Jai Ho!

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Maxwell Street Depot

Posted in Food by Chris on January 27, 2012
Have you ever been uneasy about approaching a dining establishment in fear of getting stabbed? Well you really haven’t lived until you’ve done it. From my experience these eateries have delivered the most enjoyable mixture of food and ambiance. Case and point: Maxwell Street Depot in sweet home, Chicago, IL. While there are dozens of Maxwells strewn across the city, the establishment that best balances danger and delight lies on the intersection of Canal and 32nd Streets–a few blocks west of US Cellular Park. Maxwell’s offerings are dishes best served with adrenaline coursing through your veins. As your heart rate descends from the exhilaration of a homeless man trying to rob you with a rusty shiv, make sure to order a double cheeseburger and a pork chop sandwich (be sure to load up on the onions). Complementary fries accompanies each your order and jalapenos are available upon request. What are you waiting for? Live a little.

Toki Underground

Posted in Food by Chris on January 26, 2012
Well it’s been nearly 8 months since my last blog post. “What have you been up to?” might you ask. Well my friend, many of those days have been spent squatting at DC’s not-so-secret Toki Underground shoveling ramen noodles down my throat. Located in DC’s historical H Street corridor, Toki resides in an area where dudes donning salmon chinos and their J. Crew loving ladies avoid because they find tattoos and snapback caps a bit too treacherous. Toki Underground is nestled above The Pug and seats about 20, has an average wait of an hour, is dim, and loud but is absolutely ambrosial. Decorated with figurines, skateboards, and spray paint; it’s as if I’ve awoken from a wet dream only to find myself lying in front of one of those supersized checks made out to me for $15 Million. Don’t believe me? Check it out for yourself. Toki’s menu is fairly simple but with a bevy of daily food and drink specials it’s never old. My recommendation: Miso Hakata (comeswith Pork Loin, a half-boiled egg, and extra noodles. It’ll cost you $12 and it’s worth every penny — your 0.05% APY savings account surely wont miss it — so don’t be a cheap-ass.

POMx Lychee Green Tea

Posted in Food by Chris on September 29, 2010
Anyone who knows me knows I’m a sucker for pricey bottled drinks. Grocers that sell this POMx Lychee Green Tea have my MO down pat. This 16oz bottle of juice is one of my favorites as it quenches my thirst and antioxidizes my ish. For those unfamiliar with pomegranate juice, it’s a bit tart and a bit dry- but hey, I never said it was a Kool-Aid. Besides, the Kool-Aid man’s got Diabetes, high blood pressure, hypertension, and Glaucoma. Lucky for him, POM’s around ease his fat boy’s ailments. I’m not guaranteeing any miracles, but drinking some lychee green tea can’t be the worst thing that you’ve done to yourself. Chug it or sip it. You’re a grown-ass man, you can decide for yourself.
The Zub ZenV is one of the few that are two-toned albeit not the most radical.

Curry-Ya

Posted in Food by Chris on April 13, 2010
Not to be confused with the Korea (or Corea), Curry-Ya remedies what ails every man… an empty stomach. Offering New York’s finest Japanese curry in their quaint establishment located on 10th Street and 2nd Ave (two blocks from St. Marks and 3rd); Curry-Ya makes up for the modest space by providing a healthy helping delicious of food. The curries come regular, spicy, and extra-spicy but I found the extra-spicy offering produced just barely enough heat for my palette. The entrees range from $9 – $13, an excellent deal considering that extra rice is free (a rarity in today’s economy)  and your curry supply is more or less limit-less, unless your name rhymes with Takeru Kobayashi. Curry-Ya’s menu is tagged with recommendations for those of you that are weary of venturing outside of your normal food boundaries. The recommend dish, which also happens to be pictured: Berkshire Pork Cutlet.

What’s not pictured: me drooling on myself.



Fro·zen·yo

Posted in Food by Chris on March 20, 2010
The dots in the heading weren’t exactly critical to get the point across, but they’re always fun to add in. Fro·zen·yo is Washington DC’s newest addition to its blooming frozen yogurt craze. Similar to other froyo joints, Fro·zen·yo offers a vast variety of frozen yogurt flavors and toppings. The draw of Fro·zen·yo though, is that everything offered is self-serve. The process is quite easy; simply pick up a cup, walk up to a yogurt machine, and fill up on goodies to your heart’s content. Fro·zen·yo charges by the ounce so make sure you don’t get too carried away. And for those who aren’t exactly the food adventurous type, you can try some free samples before you buck up and cough up your dough. My recommendations: original tart or tiramisu. I almost forgot, they also offer FREE FUDGE. I’m not 3OH!3, you can trust me.



Cane Coke v. Throwback Pepsi

Posted in Food by Chris on February 6, 2010
I’m not exactly sure where the rash of natural food products came from, but I’m not opposed to the fad. Whole Foods, Cane Cola, and to a lesser degree McDonald’s have been pushing more natural products in their respective markets. Not to be left behind, both Coca-Cola and Pepsi-Cola have released their very own iterations of “artificial-free” products. I came across these bad boys at CostCo and decided to give them a try. Both the Throwback Pepsi and Cane Coke tasted significantly different from their roided up brethren. The Throwback Pepsi tasted like a much crisper and less syrupy version of regular Pepsi whereas the Cane Coke was sweeter version of itself (but not to the point where it’s overbearing like RC Cola can be). Essentially, in the Cane Cola I was drinking Coke’s version of Pepsi; Throwback as Pepsi’s version of Coke (although I don’t think that was their intention). As for an objective decision on a clear winner: I give them a tie. As a Coke fan, I still prefer the taste of the Coke; plus the glass bottle doesn’t hurt.  Currently you can only get the Cane Coke in bulk at CostCo or individually at a local spanish grocers. As for the Pepsi, it is available at your local grocer.

A Salt & Battery

Posted in Food by Chris on November 11, 2009
Up near the meatpacking district of NYC lies a brick and mortar gem known as A Salt & Battery. AS&B offers authentic fish and chips (fries for those of you not in the know), brought to you just as they’d serve it across the pond. As if the genius wordplay wasn’t a good enough reason to satiate your curiosity, these guys threw down with Bobby Flay a while back and kicked his Eric Murphy looking ass. The fellows at AS&B offer several types of fish: whiting, haddock, sole, and pollock. They also offer shrimp and scallops as well as other fried goodness. With your order of fish and chips comes a small Solo container full of dipping sauce; and while I’m not sure what exactly it is, I’m absolutely positive that it’s delicious. You can check out their online menu on the A Salt & Battery website, or if you’re in Empire State, stop by and grab a bite to eat.

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S.Pellegrino

Posted in Food by Chris on October 6, 2009
Up against the likes of flat water, soda, and juices; sparkling water gets the privilege of having the title of, “The Red-Headed Step-Child of  All Beverages”. Those of you who dislike it should try to look at it this way: what did you think of your first sip of beer after you began your teenage years guzzling Bartles and James? I’m sure you can still feel how your face cringed whence it hit your palette. Today, you’re making your family tree proud, slamming them down with no remorse like WWE Superstar Stone Cold Steve Austin. Sparkling water is severely underrated and it’s not, by any means, as foul as your first sip of beer. Upside: it helps your digestive system.  Downside: It makes you pee.  That’s a fair tradeoff. So to all of you Cola fiends out there, step your non-alcoholic beverage game up and pour yourself a glass of the bubbly goodness. Please, don’t forget to squeeze in some lime. My personal favorite is S.Pellegrino, and that’s partially due to the fact that it’s readily available. You can pick yourself up a case of S.Pellegrino for $15 at your local CostCo.

SoBe Wine & Food Festival

Posted in Food, Travel by Chris on September 16, 2009
Last year, my girlfriend and I went to the SoBe Wine & Food festival in South Beach. Not only were you able to find loads of man-thongs on the beach, but it was also where you found the venue for the festivities. Small tents were set up for cooking demos and larger tents were erected for the main event: food and booze. As you walk in you are given an event booklet with a pen (for writing down recipe notes I’m guessing) and a single wine glass. The entrance led attendees into a section of the venue which was dedicated to the small tents. The large tents, were located towards the middle and rear of the venue. Restaurants (local to Miami and afar) put their best foot forward as restaurants doled out samples of steak, seafood, burgers, and other concoctions to feed the masses. Sadly, the KFC Double Down was not introduced but Whole Foods made an appearance, handing out stuff from their prepared foods section which was less than spectacular. Alcohol was also readily on hand as wine and liquor vendors, big and small, were uncorking and uncapping bottles for those ready to get their binge on. The next SoBe Wine & Food Festival begins February 25th and runs until the 28th- check the sobefest website for more info. Also, make sure you keep your grandparents proud by buying a “I’m in Miami, Bitch” t-shirt while you’re out there. It exudes classiness.
SoBeF&W